Jim, Why are you gone? why did you do the things you did? I can`t remember your laugh, your smile, your smell or that twinkle in your eyes, where did you go? we stopped playing, & talking. You were sick & irrated a lot, I wish I knew then what I know now, people would tell me things, I would ask you, but you told me to relax that I worried to much, so I didn`t belive them I belived in you, I wish I would have listened to them, maybe you wouldn`t be where your at today where ever that is. You promised me you were ok, I didn`t see the signs, you should have talked to me, was I so blind to the things you did that I didn`t see you hurting inside? were you calling out to me for help & I just didn`t hear or did I see & choose to do nothing? You always said I worried to much, maybe I didn`t worry enough, maybe if I would have said more, or worried more you`d still be here with me, I`d like to belive I did everything I could but I don`t, I`ve failed you miserably & I can`t even tell you how sorry I am, I`ll never forgive myself & I`ll never know if you`ll forgive me. I didn`t mean to let you down, I Love You & I Miss You with every part of my being. Maybe some day you`ll find it in your heart to forgive me & we can talk & play again. Mom